Run Find Your Happy Pace

finding my happy pace in running and life

Race Recap: Big Sur Half Marathon On Monterey Bay and a 5k to Boot

Back when I was still living in Virginia I signed up for The Big Sur Half Marathon mainly for two reasons.

  1. To keep myself accountable as far as continuing to run once we moved
  2. Because its one of America’s most beautiful half marathons

Mission completed.  I’m still running and it truly was an absolutely beautiful run.  Here’s my recap of the weekend:


Late Friday night I decided last minute to run the Lighthouse 5k on Saturday morning.  The 5k is part of the Half Marathon weekend and because well why not right?  Back in VA there are plenty of events with multiple races on the same weekend.  Why not make one for myself.  The course is a short walk from my house and my youngest would be there for the annual Cub Scout pancake breakfast.  So bright and early Saturday I made my way down to Lover’s Point and signed up at walk up registration.  I decided to use this flat beautiful course as a shakeout run, nice and easy.  It was a perfect cool sunny morning for a run along the beautiful coast.  In the end I was pleasantly surprised that I completed my shakeout at a pace I use to struggle to complete a 5k at.  Could those training hills be working?  Or did I go too fast and possibly jeopardize my half?  Eeek!  













Saturday Night.

I met up with a few fellow Sub 30 Club friends who came to town for the Half Marathon.  We had dinner in downtown Monterey with some great food and conversation.  It’s funny how runners can just meet up and talk for hours and hours isn’t it?  Awesome peeps!  Highlight of the night, we each got to sign one of the famous Sub 30 Flags.  The flag is being sent all around the country to subbers for good luck and comradery from the main group of almost 4,000 running buddies.  What a great boost for Sunday’s race!


Subbers and I from the Sub 30 Club


Race Day:

I had plan A, plan B and the no fail plan C for Sunday’s half.

  • Plan A – shoot for a new PR of at least one minute
  • Plan B – shoot for an even better PR
  • Plan C – if it doesn’t happen, enjoy the ride!

California has brought me some new running buddies along with lots of hills to train on.  Hills are something that are hard to find in Virginia Beach.  So for the past 4 months I have learned the love/hate relationship of running them.  Oh and Palo Corona, which is more of a mountain really.  But I digress, in my mind if I have been running all these hills then they must have a pay off at some point.  At least I sure hoped so!  Thus my quest for a new PR.

The half itself is run like a well oiled machine.  The folks at BSIM (Big Sur International Marathon) sure know what they are doing.  Everything from packet pick up and the shuttles to/from the race were easy to find and navigate.  Volunteers were plentiful on the course as were water / Gatorade etc.  I even had the joy of having my oldest volunteering on the course!  Getting a hug (and some water) at around mile 8-9 from my son was amazing :)  The course has a few uphill climbs, but nothing close to what I have trained on so I did fine.  There was live music and DJ’s along the course, and post race grub was also plentiful.  But the real winner of the race… the views along the course.

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I was blessed to bump into one of my Wednesday night running buddies in he starting corral.  I told her about my hopes to PR, she graciously volunteered herself and her husband to pace me for my goal.  Saki is awesome, and a machine, for real.


Saki and I in the starting corral

And by the way her husband is an awesome pacer!  The two of them had just come off a 10 mile trail run the previous day and were taking it easy for the half (lucky for me!)  Her PR for this course is a 2:01!  So we decided on a plan of staying with the pace group for the first half and then seeing how I felt at the turnaround.  *Except for a quick stop (yes I failed and got in the corral to early and had to pee!! Ughh.)   We stayed with the pacers until just after the turnaround.  side note:  If that port-o-potty stop had cost me my PR I would probably never forgive myself.   After the turnaround (just about mile 7 1/2) we slowly and steadily we made our surge.

Mile 10 is usually my hardest mile, and this half was no different.  I started with my self-doubt.  “I can’t PR, I have to walk blah, blah, blah, etc” Then I started to hear the pacer’s voice from the group we had broken away from.  I may have used a few choice words, which I shall not repeat here, out loud and decided “That’s it!” “I do not want to hear them again!”  Off I went.  Did you know being mad really can make you faster?  I thought about God, my Mom and my I run 4 buddy Logan.  I wanted to do this for all of them and myself.  I kept repeating their names in my head.  Saki paced me until sometime around mile 10 1/2 – 11 and then sent me on my way.  I was in the zone and the last two miles ended up being my fastest miles of the entire race.  I really appreciated Saki more than she can ever know.

I PR’d by almost 3 minutes!  Which for me is huge!  So hooray for hills, I might be getting older but I am also getting a bit faster :)  And I have to admit there were also some tears of joy at the end of the race.  And as if it wasn’t already a great day I got to meet the Kara Goucher!  She ran the race and had come in first for the women with a 1:11.  An additional bonus was I actually got to see her on the course.  She is amazing.

Here are some additional pics from the day.  First California Half (and 5k) in the books!



Kara and I…she may be my girl crush


Sub 30 “Dark Side” Flag. Post Race



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What’ s Up @Runfyhp? California Edition

I feel like time is flying by since we arrived in California.  I cannot believe we have been here for over 2 months already!

So what’s up with me?

Family Life:

After arriving in Cali and squaring away the necessities of finding a grocery store, getting our household goods delivered and unpacked, etc. we set out an about to get acquainted with our new surroundings.  There is a lot to do and see here and a ton of outdoor activities.  We found a new church, a Trader Joe’s, and have hit both the Aquarium and Cannery Row.  One of the best features is the location of our new house.  We live close enough to walk to the beach, downtown and church.  We are still missing some back east creature comforts.  OK I’m going to admit upfront that these are clearly “first world problems” but sometimes you become creatures of habit even with the little things.  The kiddos miss Martin’s Potato Bread and Chick-fil-A.  I miss being so close to the commissary and exchange.  Who knew, lol.  The kids started school in early August so their summer was cut a tad short.  They are adjusting well and are involved in sports and other school activities.


Running here is A-MAZE-ING!  The temperature rarely gets out of the 70’s and humidity for the most part is all but nonexistent.  When the temps reach over 80 the locals start to melt.  Most houses and businesses do not have air conditioning so fans have become our new best friends.  There are trails all around me.  I can run out my front door and be on the coastal beach trail in minutes or run to the Monterey Bay Recreation trail in about 2 miles.  God has truly blessed me as far as giving me an absolutely beautiful place to run.  I am starting to adjust to the fact that all is not flat here like Virginia Beach.  In the end its going to really benefit my running.  It took me a while but I think I have finally found a running group that fits into our family schedule.  I would like to make at least one run per week to run with a group.  I have been running solo for way too long.  I appreciate the comroterey, spirit and the push from a group.  I signed up for my first half before we even left Virginia to keep myself accountable and this will help me get my grove back.  I am all signed up for the Big Sur Half Marathon in November.  It will be my first official half in California and I am so looking forward to it.



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Yes I even rejoined the work force and got a part-time job.  Its been a long time since I have done anything other than volunteer work.  God has also lead me to a wonderful company.   I work at a local family owned running store called The Treadmill.  They have been so gracious helping me fit working into our very busy family schedule.  I am learning new things every day and “The Crew” there couldn’t be any more welcoming or inspirational.  Bonus points for Group Fun Runs that the company holds two times each month at Palo Cornona Park up to Inspiration Point.  It’s an awesome training run for my stamina.  I may not ever make that “hill’ (ok its a freakin’ mountain) mine, but I will make it up there a little easier each time.  My husband and I have set that as a goal for ourselves.



Working has led to a greater need to schedule running and working out it general.  So I feel for all of you who work crazy hours and still get it done each week.  Kudos to you all and feel free to send any tips my way :)



I am proud to continue my relationship as an Ambassador for Girls Gone Sporty, Fit Approach, Crazy Compression, RoadID and now InkNBurn!  Great positive people, communities and wonderful products.


That’s my update for now.  How is everything in your world?






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Running for MY Future – Heart Rate Training Update

Disclaimer ** Please note I am not a personal trainer nor any other sort of medical professional.  Information is based on my personal experience and is just that.  Please consult a doctor before performing any sort of physical activity.



Last August I started Heart Rate Training (HRT)  (to read more about it click here for: Why Running Slow Really Might Be the New Fast)

Although I originally chose HRT to help me get back into distance running after 6 months of low mileage running, I’m now looking at is a solid plan for my running future.  When I first started researching HRT I actually got a lot of negative feedback from people.  Mostly “Oh, that’s only for elite athletes.”  Well being the stubborn bull I am (I’m a Taurus) I decided to go for it anyway and I’m glad I did.  FYI: Apparently I possess all the best traits for HRT.

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First of let me lay all MY cards on the table as to why its time for me to start looking into the future of my running:

1)I’m not in my twenties or thirties anymore.  Alright dang it I’m in my mid 40’s.  (But really it’s not so bad, honest!)

2)I’ve never been super speedy, or even very speedy for that matter and HRT isn’t going to make me speedy.

In fact some days I feel like Homer:



3) I didn’t start running until my mid thirties and didn’t run my first half marathon until I was 40.  Just call me a late bloomer :)

So why on earth would I choose HRT?  Well, for this one main reason.  I want to run into my future for as long and healthy as I can, period.

So lets revisit the benefits of HRT:

You will build up a solid aerobic base.
You will run more efficiently.
Most runs are done at an easy comfortable pace (which gets faster with time I promise)
It will prevent over-training or under training by working at the right intensity for each run.
You don’t feel beat up at the end of a run.
You should be less prone to injury.
Eventually your pace will improve (you will be running longer and stronger at an easier effort)


So how has spending so much time in my aerobic zone helped?  Well lets look at some of my actual Heart Rate data.  ***I wanted to include some of my older HRT data but Garmin Connect has lost my 2014 data.  Whaaaaaaaaa!  I sent them an email and hoping they can get it back!!  (My first HRT runs looked much more like my third chart (post flu) listed below.)

January 2015 – 8 mile run: Slow and steady but still a lot of HR fluctuation.  

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Recent 10 mile long run.  Notice that my heart rate is much more steady and in zone, that’s what your aiming for. Staying steadily in your zone.

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Another nice thing, though be it frustrating at times, is knowing when to slow down especially due to sickness / recovery.  In January I got the flu.  Coming back from said flu was no joke.  But I trusted my instincts and my heart rate and new when I was pushing too hard, too soon. (see below) 

HRT 2 mile run right after having the flu:  (yea, not good.) PS:  This is more like what my early HRT runs looked like.

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So am I blazing fast?  Hahahaha…no.  I’m still working on speed, however I rarely feel spent after a run, even a long run.  I have done 6 half marathons since starting HRT with my average time as before HRT with less fatigue, less soreness   Please note I do NOT wear my Heart Rate Monitor for races.  I run by feel.  In fact in November 2014 I missed a PR by seconds!

Does it happen overnight?  No, no and no.  Patience is key.  I also belong to an online group of HRT runners ( Sub 30 Heart Rate Training) We share a lot of support and information and its nice to see the transformation and success stories.



Are there some down sides?  Well yes.  I rarely have “pace” running buddies.  My hubby will run with me when he can just so we can spend time together #keeper.  HRT paces are really individual and most runners do NOT run in their aerobic zone but go all out every run and end up spending most to all their time in their anaerobic zone.  It can still be very humbling when I am out there running on the roads and trails.  Getting passed by other runners is a daily occurrence.  I have to remind myself that it’s not about their pace, it’s about my fitness and this is the type of training I choose.  And hey when you have this view to look at, I think I can deal just fine!

What more info about HRT?  Check out these books **  Please not I am in now way connected to nor a sponsor for the following books.  Names are provided for informational purposes only.

Heart Monitor Training for the Compleat Idiot  (John L. Parker)

The Maffetone Method (Philip Maffetone)

80/20 Running: Run Stronger and Race Faster by Training Slow  (Matt Fitzgerald and Robert Johnson)



It’s a Sweet Motivational Monday!

Short and sweet!


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Motivational Monday – Walk to End Alzheimer’s

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For the second year in a row I am all signed up and ready to Walk to End Alzheimer’s.  This year I will be participating in the Monterey, CA walk on September 26, 2015.

As many of you may know my mother was diagnosed with early onset a few years back.  To read more about our journey click here.  Alzheimer’s changed my parents and my family’s world.  As devastating and heartbreaking as this disease is we were lucky to find a wonderful Alzheimer’s specialized nursing home unit close to my parents home when we were no longer able to care for her at home.  But what would be even better?  A Cure!

Did you know? 

With a donation, you can help the Alzheimer’s Association® continue to provide care and support to the more than five million Americans with Alzheimer’s and their over 15 million caregivers. Your generosity would also help to advance the research that will one day lead us to methods of prevention, treatment and, ultimately, a cure for the disease. Every dollar counts in this fight.

Alzheimer’s disease is the 6th leading cause of death, and affects millions of people daily.

The Alzheimer’s Association® is committed to accelerating the global effort to eliminate Alzheimer’s disease and is the largest nonprofit funder of Alzheimer’s research.

So where is the motivation in the motivational monday you might ask?

Well the motivation needs to come from both you and I.  Would you consider donating or even walking in your local Walk to End Alzheimer’s.  I walk for my mom, my family and all those affected by this disease.  Together we can help provide the funds needed to make a difference today and look forward to a cure tomorrow!


Click here to donate:

Darlena’s Walk to End Alzheimer’s 

Fundraising Page


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One Month In Already? The Good, the Bad and the Ugly of a Cross Country Trek

Has it really been an entire month since this?

I made it, I can't believe I made it!

I made it, I can’t believe I made it!

Apparently yes, yes it has.  We have now officially been in California for an entire whirlwind of a month.  So here is the good, the bad and the ugly.

The good. I drove well over 3,000 miles (see above photo)  Yes me, if you really know me this is a HUGE accomplishment for the girl who falls asleep when not driving if a trip is longer than 15 minutes.  I also learned that “endurance” driving is like doing a half marathon.  If you want the time to go by you need to be alert yet in the zone at the same time.  I thank my time spent distance running for helping pass 8-10 hours on the road each day.  Get in the zone, don’t think about how much longer you have, just get it done.  You see we drove both our cars from the east coast.  In the Mom-mobile my crew was both my sons and just for fun our 2 cats, because if your going to drive cross-country you might as well add a few animals into the mix.

Snickers.  Cat, dog or ferret?

Snickers. Cat, dog or ferret?
















Traveling is exhausting

Traveling is exhausting

For the first few days we had some pretty good (read: blinding) rain storms rain storms.  So on day 3 we replaced my wipers.  As you can probably guess….it never rained again, lol.   We did however get to see some really neat places on our travels such as this…


That is salt NOT snow, pretty cool.











And this.



OK we have no idea what that is but it was cool.  We renamed it the tennis ball tree.

My youngest played the iPad (ok probably too much, but hey it kept the complaints to a minimum so don’t judge me) and cracked jokes along the way.  We played a couple of entertaining, if not slightly disturbing, rounds of “Would you rather”.  Side note: whoever wrote the cards for that game has some issues…just saying.  My oldest was a pretty awesome copilot, keeping me company and reading google news to me when I started to get tired.  But best of all we got to spend time together and I realized he an I have the same sense of humor.  We like to laugh at the same things and enjoyed spending quality time with squishy (inside joke)  I love you kiddos!

The bad:  We saw very few accidents (ok yes that is good) except for the day the SUV right in front of my husband and daughter almost flipped.  Two things here, I am glad my husband had taken a drivers defense course at one time and God had his hand on that SUV, it swerved, spun and even went up on two tires but never flipped or hit any other vehicles on this busy stretch of road.  Depending on which way you take, driving across country can be very boring.  Lots of road, not a lot to look.  Unless you like grass, sand, dirt and lots of tractor trailers.  Also apparently different GPS’s don’t always agree.  We only lost each other once.


The ugly:  In true PCS style (ok wait for it here comes the whinny part of the trip) a bunch of unexpected events happened.  This time not broken appliances or lost household goods.  As a family we lost not one but two Uncles (on my husband’s side) God Bless you Uncle James and Uncle Michael.  As we were just arriving in Cali this made it impossible to grieve with family as they are now literally on the other side of the country.  I also found out one of my Brother In Laws has been pretty ill  (at the time) due to an unknown cause, don’t worry he is fine now.  Then within a weeks time of arriving in California my Dad was rushed to the ER and later received triple bypass surgery.  Again we are here he is waaaaay on the east coast.  A few days later my husband’s aunt lands in the hospital with a severe illness.  I swear to you we cannot make this stuff up.  My daughter fell in a freak accident after church and nearly broke her nose, it was a close call.  Apparently if you can sprain your nose that’s what she did.  Thankfully no black eyes and only minor swelling but a good amount of pain.  We had placed ourselves and all our family in God’s hands, even before we ever hit the road here.  God is good, we know he has everything under control.  Imagine what would have happened if we didn’t trust in Him.

But enough of that!  This part of California is lovely, beautiful, breathtaking and like perfect running conditions EVERY day.  I am not kidding.  No humidity and partly cloudy to sunny.  Mornings start in the upper 50’s and go to highs in the 70’s.  I think we had one day in the 80’s, the locals were dying.  There are many misty mornings but hardly ever rains (both good and bad).  We had a thunderstorm last weekend which didn’t faze us being from the east coast, however according to the locals this was a really big deal.  Apparently they haven’t had a thunderstorm here in years.  Yes read that again my East Coast friends….years.  Who knew?  The downside for me at the moment is hills.  Virginia Beach is flat-as-a-pancake land.  Spending the last 5+ years running there makes one not well hill adapted.  I should have spent some more quality time at Mount Trashmore.  However I am determined to rock these hills….eventually.  Or at least climb them without dying.  If not at least I know if I am ever a flat lander again I should be speedy, or at least speedier than when I got here.

I have a feeling it will be hard to leave here when the time comes at least from a running point of view.  Luckily we have a few years here to enjoy it all.   Check it out…try not to drool.

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Oh and one last thing.  Never fear I have found a cupcake place here :)  Gotta have my cupcakes.




On the Move (almost) Part 1 – Motivational Monday

Motivational Monday:  God is the same today, tomorrow and always

Hebrews 13:8 New International Version (NIV)

8 Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever.

No matter what is going on in your life, God never changes.  Our lives change, our circumstances change and we let life distract us from Him but he never takes His eyes off of us.  Never.

What’s up with Finding My Happy Pace in running?   Well to be honest its been at a complete standstill but NOT BY CHOICE!!  Just about 3 weeks ago I had to have a minor procedure, I’m fine, no worries, but it did require stitches.  Stitches wouldn’t have been a biggie except they are on the side of my knee so the Doc said no running.  “OK I’ll just walk….a lot” I said.  “Oh no.  No walking for exercise either.” said Doc.  WHAT?!?!  The only good thing about no running or walking was the timing.

What’s up with Finding My Happy Pace in life?  We (my family) are getting ready for a big move. Moving in general is no fun, moving across the country, well that adds a whole new level of “fun”.  So no running meant more time for me to obsess over how much stuff we have and how much we don’t need.

Since we were fully aware of the upcoming move.  I have been trying to declutter the house since January 1 of this year.  My family on the other hand has not been too keen on the house de-cluttering process, its pretty much been a one woman show.  But I do feel like I made some good progress.  I even bought a book about de-cluttering, hahaha, go ahead and laugh (my hubby did)  I think his words were like “Sooooo, you bought a book about how to de-clutter?  Doesn’t that book actually add to the clutter in the house?”  Turd ;) ( I say that lovingly, really)  I actually liked the book a lot and related to a lot it was saying.  The book was Clutter Free by Kathi Lipp by the way, in case your interested.**  But I digress.  De-cluttering has been an awesome freeing feeling.  We still have a lot to go but its been a good start, for me anyway.

And now June has snuck up on us all.  This past week the packers have come and packed all our belongings (the amount of boxes is still unreal #firstworldproblems) , the truck came yesterday and the house is pretty much cleared out.  We shall be living on blow up beds and sleeping bags for the next week, I think its kind of neat and so far no complaints from the peanut gallery.  I am hoping to declutter more on the backend of the move.

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As far as my future running:  My stitches finally come out Monday wahoo!  My hope is to get a few runs in this week since the packing is all done.  I’m going to miss these routes I have mapped out the past 5 years.  You know the routes that you can run by feel anything from a mile to 10 but know exactly when to turn around.  And the shady routes you stick to on a hot summer day. Sigh.  I will miss you.  But I am also ready for some new and challenging running and life adventures!   Keep an eye out for all new adventures!


** I have no affiliation with Kathy Lipp or Clutter Free but I really did enjoy it.



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Thought for the Day – Give it YOUR All

Running about so much more than speed.  It’s about being the best you that you can be, and giving it your all.


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Motivational Monday – The Historic Half – What I Learned About Me

Quick Motivational Monday and Historic Half recap in words and pictures:


Things learned from a truly hot and hilly half marathon.

  • Hills are tough, I am tougher
  • I need more hill training in my life
  • Take Gatorade at the water stops on a really hot day, even if you hate it, you need it (done)
  • You can accomplish much more than you think.  Less doubting..more doing
  • Challenges are good and make you a better person & runner
  • HRT (heart rate training) truly does improve your endurance
  • I finished and it wasn’t about my time it was about my effort
  • When conditions aren’t ideal, run smart
  • Marines are good motivators
  • Bring on the next one!



God is good, life is good  :)


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Not the first or last but, the biggest hill of the half


Making our way up Hospital Hill












On course entertainment – downtown Fredericksburg



Mother’s Day and Mom’s Journey with Alzheimer’s Disease

Mother’s Day was bittersweet for me this year.  As I stand here hundreds of miles away from my own Mom I am brought to tears.  Yes I am lucky to be my age and still have my Mother and I know that, but this weekend marks a year since my Mother lost her ability to walk, feed herself and for the most part effectively communicate.  My Mom has Alzheimer’s Disease.


What exactly happened that weekend a year ago no one really knows.  You see my Mom had suffered from early onset for years.  At first we noticed the usual things like repeating herself and becoming confused, we eventually insisted that her doctor send her for testing.  Our fears and hers were confirmed, Mom was diagnosed with early onset in her mid 60’s.  Thru the next few years the forgetfulness progressed which led to my Dad becoming her main caretaker.  Eventually we could no longer allow her to continue to drive for her safety and the safety of others on the road.  Not soon after that she could no longer venture out alone because she could not remember simple things like her name, address or phone number.  Depression ensued and all the other trappings of this terrible disease.

As the years and the disease progressed my Mom stopped calling me by name  During my trips up North , she knew she “knew” me but never really used my name to reference me anymore.  Then 3 years ago while visiting for Christmas, my mother no longer knew who I was.  You see I am the only one of my siblings who, at this time, lives out-of-state.  I was the first child to be lost in the haze of Alzheimer’s.  The first time it becomes reality it hits you like a Mac truck, it’s heartbreaking.  You never want to think your Mother could forget who you are.  Even though I had seen it happen to my Mom with her own mother, it doesn’t make it any easier.  I was helping with organizing my parents house and getting rid of things they would no longer need, my Mom turns to my Dad and asked “Who is that?”  “That” person was me.  She still smiled at me and we were able to converse but it was more like acquaintances.

Thankfully through the progression of the disease my Dad has had help from my siblings.  They took turns between their own families and lives to help with Mom.  I also have a friend with experience caring for the elderly who was able to take Mom on a few hours a week.   I am eternally greatful to my siblings and I don’t think they will ever know just how thankful I am for all the did and continue to do.  Distance and family of my own prevent me from spending the time I wish I could up in CT

As the years have passed Mom now no longer knows my siblings, her siblings or her grandchildren.  We all realize she knows us in her heart.  I pray for her and to her through Jesus and I ask that he gives her a simple warm feeling in her heart each time I think about her.  For I know although her mind and body are weak BUT her soul and her love for Him and He for her are still alive and well within her.

Joshua 1:5  No one will be able to stand against you all the days of your life. As I was with Moses, so I will be with you; I will never leave you nor forsake you.

Fast forward to May 2014 and my Mom was now in adult day care most days during the week.  She needed help with everything from dressing to eating and everything in between.  But she could still walk (in fact she walked up to 20 hours a day, since she rarely slept, another effect of the disease), although her gait was now hunched to the side and more of a shuffle.  She could still feed herself with encouragement and reminders.  But then something went terribly wrong and my Mom lost all ability to care for herself.  An infection had consumed her body and treatment/tests at the hospital did not go as planned and we believe contributed to her downward spiral.  So last Mother’s Day myself, my Dad and all my siblings were sitting in a hospital with my Mom who was barely able to lift her head.  Frail, confused, no longer able to walk or move she lie at what very likely could have been death’s door.

Flung into a system not equipped to care for someone of her age/condition she ended up in a mental health facility.  You see she couldn’t go back home and yet there was nowhere else for her to go.  Since this facility wasn’t a “regular” hospital or nursing home we were only allowed certain hours for visitation.  We did all we could to stay on top of the staff to make sure they would at least attempt to feed her.  Like I said they were not staffed for someone in her state of health.  Heartbreaking, frustrating, devastating.

I stayed as long as I could up in CT, and when I returned to my own family the plan was to have her put into the first available bed at an Alzheimer’s equipped nursing facility .  That was a Saturday morning.  By Sunday I was on the phone with my family and they were talking Hospice care.  Mom had now stopped eating and drinking all together.  She was put on hydration IV and things were not looking good at all.  Only by the grace of God only did she start to take liquids on her own a few days later.  Soon after God also opened up a bed a Nursing Facility very close to my Dad’s house.  My Mom has lived there ever since.  The facility, though small has been an absolute blessing to my family.  Close to my Dad, with no “set” visiting hours my Dad and family can visit any time, any day.

My Dad is there twice a day everyday.  He loves her as much today as he ever has, probably even more.  He feeds Mom lunch and dinner.  With his help she eats like a champ and has recently gone for 95 lbs to 106!  This is a huge victory for her.  My Dad has also become a friend to all those who reside in the facility.  He knows each resident by name, how each likes their coffee and can often be seen serving others other than my Mother.  I am so proud to call him my Dad for his heart is big and his ego small.  He is doing the work of God each time he steps foot in that nursing facility, for all those he comes into contact with.  He can often be seen chatting with the residents and their families.  The nurses love him to pieces.

As for Mom She still smiles when she sees him and sometimes even calls him by name.  They were able to spend their 50th wedding anniversary together last summer at surrounded by the entire family.  We have been able to take her out of the facility for every major holiday so far.  She will never regain her ability to walk or take care of herself on her own again and that is the reality of the situation, she seems happy, and is well cared for..


I am lucky to still have her and that she is doing as well as she can.  There are definitely times that I have to stop being selfish about the situation and how I feel.  Although I still struggle with the “Why” of this situation I must remind myself that everything happens for a reason.  God’s got this, He is trying to show us all something, and we need to be open to learn and grow.  He will reveal his plan to us all someday and it WILL make perfect sense.

Deuteronomy 32:4 He is the Rock, his works are perfect, and all his ways are just. A faithful God who does no wrong, upright and just is he.


So what can we do?  Open your heart to the less fortunate, serve others first, fight for a cause.  And always, always do what is right in the eyes of God.  As a runner I use Charity Miles to raise funds for Alzheimer’s Association, I have participated in the Walk to End Alzheimer’s and hope to continue to do so.  Not just for Mom, not just for me, but for all those affected by Alzheimer’s.

Happy Mother’s Day Mom, I love you!